I love creepypasta stories the way that crack head loves coke. I can go through hours of them with no breaks. I'm always amazed at the talent these writers demonstrate. I really believe that the next Stephen King is out there writing a short story where a family in the woods is being attacked by a giant zit monster from space. Or a serial killer. Whatever.
I find that a lot of creepypastas are about isolation and paranormal stuff. Things that you expect from the horror genre in general. In general you expect the horror genre to be hilariously unscary or too terrifyingly real. House of the Dead is a movie that is hilariously unscary but is terrifyingly boring. Resident Evil 6 the movie is one of the greatest comedies that has ever been made. Both of these fine examples of what a film should not be are based on video games. The games are way better.
I loved one that I listened to where the guys went to the moon but they weren't supposed to. The big reveal was that aliens had told us to stay put on Earth, or Else. But we didn't listen of course. Anyway, they are great. A lot of them have to do with serial killers too which is always great. I've only met one person that I truly believed was a psychopath and I never want to meet another one. But I'll be damned if I don't consume 88 hours a week of psychopath related fiction and non-fiction in books and movies. Maybe it's been 2 psychopaths for me, and no I've never dated one but that would have been a great easy joke to make.
Shot Glass Thought: LSD vs Therapy App
More and more you hear of people getting therapy from alternative sources. I don't want anything to do with alternatives sources of therapy unless LSD counts. Further, anything that gets you high as shit. I'm not endorsing drug use...officially. Therapy is supposed to be done between two individuals. Not one person and a cell phone. Stay far away from apps that are supposed to hear out your deepest darkest troubles and just hit the couch with the closest caring professional. Does this have anything to do with Christmas? Well no, it doesn't. But I would like to high as shit. Anyway, Merry Christmas and enjoy your families.
Shot Glass Thought: Truethmas
I am thankful for the opportunity to be thankful. Secondarily, I am thankful for the people that listen to me bitch. I'd like to tell myself that I'm thankful more often than I'm bitching but I'm also trying to stop lying to myself all the time. Things like "We haven't gained that much weight. She really did love me, she just wanted to see the world first. She'll come back. I have lot's of friends and we're all really close." You get the picture. Oh Well, Merry Christmas ya filthy animals.
Short Funny Story: Words From the Sentient Empty Shell
I trimmed my beard for the first time in about 3 weeks. Feels good when your face doesn't feel weighed down. I also love how there are always some beardless plebs that tell me "Ah bro you should have kept it bro. That beard was almost alpha bro."
If I wanted to prove my alphaness I would work much harder to earn a huge living. Then I would tell everyone, but more specifically every hot waitress that I came across how much money I make. Seems like hot waitresses really turn on a guy with a lot of money and power. I prefer the waitress that strictly adheres to mise en place.
Then I'd brag too much on my way out of the restaurant and get taken out by the biggest fan of the recent Joker movie. But at least I would be dead then and not later. That's supposed to be a punchline about how it sucks to go on living. But I don't think it works unless you're a sentient empty shell like myself.
If I wanted to prove my alphaness I would work much harder to earn a huge living. Then I would tell everyone, but more specifically every hot waitress that I came across how much money I make. Seems like hot waitresses really turn on a guy with a lot of money and power. I prefer the waitress that strictly adheres to mise en place.
Then I'd brag too much on my way out of the restaurant and get taken out by the biggest fan of the recent Joker movie. But at least I would be dead then and not later. That's supposed to be a punchline about how it sucks to go on living. But I don't think it works unless you're a sentient empty shell like myself.
Comedy Story: Went to the Wrastlin'
Forest, a friend of mine and I went to a local professional wrestling event a few months back. I haven't written about it till now because I was too busy trying to wash the smell of cigarette smoke and desperation out of my clothes.
The first guys to go up were pretty professional I think. I don't watch wrestling so I'm not sure what I should have been looking for. But the crowd cheered the loudest when they were on and they did the most flipping around and falling off of things, so I assume that means they were the best.
A lot of people in the crowd shouted at the wrestlers and they all had characters. Some were clearly good guys and others were clearly bad guys. The most obvious instance of this was when they had a really, really gay guy wrestled a 15 year old girl. The girl won and the gay guy was arrested for obscenity. Which in rural NC just means "No fags aloud at the wrastlin'."
There was a duo that dressed up as a Space Jam theme. They were supposed to be the kid friendly group. I don't have kids but if they were fans of something as lame as that I would trade them in for some new kids.
Overall it was a lot of fun to watch the wrestlers do crazy things, then react to the audience reacting to the wrestlers. There is a zero chance that I'll ever attend another event like that again. But at least now I know for sure that I hate the experience, instead of just being pretty sure that I hate it.
One last thing about the place, everyone that I thought would be there, was there. Wife beaters and camo will never go out of style in the county where I live, if this event was any indication.
The first guys to go up were pretty professional I think. I don't watch wrestling so I'm not sure what I should have been looking for. But the crowd cheered the loudest when they were on and they did the most flipping around and falling off of things, so I assume that means they were the best.
A lot of people in the crowd shouted at the wrestlers and they all had characters. Some were clearly good guys and others were clearly bad guys. The most obvious instance of this was when they had a really, really gay guy wrestled a 15 year old girl. The girl won and the gay guy was arrested for obscenity. Which in rural NC just means "No fags aloud at the wrastlin'."
There was a duo that dressed up as a Space Jam theme. They were supposed to be the kid friendly group. I don't have kids but if they were fans of something as lame as that I would trade them in for some new kids.
Overall it was a lot of fun to watch the wrestlers do crazy things, then react to the audience reacting to the wrestlers. There is a zero chance that I'll ever attend another event like that again. But at least now I know for sure that I hate the experience, instead of just being pretty sure that I hate it.
One last thing about the place, everyone that I thought would be there, was there. Wife beaters and camo will never go out of style in the county where I live, if this event was any indication.
Shot Glass Thought: Legalize Cannabis Already
Recent polls have shown increased support for legalizing cannabis for recreational use in America. Specialists believe that the numbers would be much lower if they polled your angry, screaming, local Baptist preacher.
Shot Glass Thought: Russian Shit Posters
Some people believe that Russia is spending their time manipulating people on Facebook in order to sew discontent in America. I only see idiotic memes and uninteresting shit posted by friends that I'm no longer in touch with on there. So Russia really needs to step it's game up. If you're going to sew discontent, then you might need a bigger needle than shit posting on Facebook.
Original story: https://www.themarysue.com/russian-trolls-worse-than-we-thought/
Original story: https://www.themarysue.com/russian-trolls-worse-than-we-thought/
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