Shot Glass Thought: Truethmas
I am thankful for the opportunity to be thankful. Secondarily, I am thankful for the people that listen to me bitch. I'd like to tell myself that I'm thankful more often than I'm bitching but I'm also trying to stop lying to myself all the time. Things like "We haven't gained that much weight. She really did love me, she just wanted to see the world first. She'll come back. I have lot's of friends and we're all really close." You get the picture. Oh Well, Merry Christmas ya filthy animals.
Short Funny Story: Words From the Sentient Empty Shell
I trimmed my beard for the first time in about 3 weeks. Feels good when your face doesn't feel weighed down. I also love how there are always some beardless plebs that tell me "Ah bro you should have kept it bro. That beard was almost alpha bro."
If I wanted to prove my alphaness I would work much harder to earn a huge living. Then I would tell everyone, but more specifically every hot waitress that I came across how much money I make. Seems like hot waitresses really turn on a guy with a lot of money and power. I prefer the waitress that strictly adheres to mise en place.
Then I'd brag too much on my way out of the restaurant and get taken out by the biggest fan of the recent Joker movie. But at least I would be dead then and not later. That's supposed to be a punchline about how it sucks to go on living. But I don't think it works unless you're a sentient empty shell like myself.
If I wanted to prove my alphaness I would work much harder to earn a huge living. Then I would tell everyone, but more specifically every hot waitress that I came across how much money I make. Seems like hot waitresses really turn on a guy with a lot of money and power. I prefer the waitress that strictly adheres to mise en place.
Then I'd brag too much on my way out of the restaurant and get taken out by the biggest fan of the recent Joker movie. But at least I would be dead then and not later. That's supposed to be a punchline about how it sucks to go on living. But I don't think it works unless you're a sentient empty shell like myself.
Comedy Story: Went to the Wrastlin'
Forest, a friend of mine and I went to a local professional wrestling event a few months back. I haven't written about it till now because I was too busy trying to wash the smell of cigarette smoke and desperation out of my clothes.
The first guys to go up were pretty professional I think. I don't watch wrestling so I'm not sure what I should have been looking for. But the crowd cheered the loudest when they were on and they did the most flipping around and falling off of things, so I assume that means they were the best.
A lot of people in the crowd shouted at the wrestlers and they all had characters. Some were clearly good guys and others were clearly bad guys. The most obvious instance of this was when they had a really, really gay guy wrestled a 15 year old girl. The girl won and the gay guy was arrested for obscenity. Which in rural NC just means "No fags aloud at the wrastlin'."
There was a duo that dressed up as a Space Jam theme. They were supposed to be the kid friendly group. I don't have kids but if they were fans of something as lame as that I would trade them in for some new kids.
Overall it was a lot of fun to watch the wrestlers do crazy things, then react to the audience reacting to the wrestlers. There is a zero chance that I'll ever attend another event like that again. But at least now I know for sure that I hate the experience, instead of just being pretty sure that I hate it.
One last thing about the place, everyone that I thought would be there, was there. Wife beaters and camo will never go out of style in the county where I live, if this event was any indication.
The first guys to go up were pretty professional I think. I don't watch wrestling so I'm not sure what I should have been looking for. But the crowd cheered the loudest when they were on and they did the most flipping around and falling off of things, so I assume that means they were the best.
A lot of people in the crowd shouted at the wrestlers and they all had characters. Some were clearly good guys and others were clearly bad guys. The most obvious instance of this was when they had a really, really gay guy wrestled a 15 year old girl. The girl won and the gay guy was arrested for obscenity. Which in rural NC just means "No fags aloud at the wrastlin'."
There was a duo that dressed up as a Space Jam theme. They were supposed to be the kid friendly group. I don't have kids but if they were fans of something as lame as that I would trade them in for some new kids.
Overall it was a lot of fun to watch the wrestlers do crazy things, then react to the audience reacting to the wrestlers. There is a zero chance that I'll ever attend another event like that again. But at least now I know for sure that I hate the experience, instead of just being pretty sure that I hate it.
One last thing about the place, everyone that I thought would be there, was there. Wife beaters and camo will never go out of style in the county where I live, if this event was any indication.
Shot Glass Thought: Legalize Cannabis Already
Recent polls have shown increased support for legalizing cannabis for recreational use in America. Specialists believe that the numbers would be much lower if they polled your angry, screaming, local Baptist preacher.
Shot Glass Thought: Russian Shit Posters
Some people believe that Russia is spending their time manipulating people on Facebook in order to sew discontent in America. I only see idiotic memes and uninteresting shit posted by friends that I'm no longer in touch with on there. So Russia really needs to step it's game up. If you're going to sew discontent, then you might need a bigger needle than shit posting on Facebook.
Original story: https://www.themarysue.com/russian-trolls-worse-than-we-thought/
Original story: https://www.themarysue.com/russian-trolls-worse-than-we-thought/
Shot Glass Thought: Not Evil Incarnate
A 14 year old young man shot his older sister and her boyfriend with a shotgun during a house party recently. Maybe there was an incestuous relationship going on between the sister and brother. Anybody think to ask about that? Maybe she's just a cheating bitch. That's the new trend in porn right? Everybody is banging their stepmoms and stepsisters and sometimes it's a prank somehow. I'm just saying, the news is treating the kid like he is evil incarnate. Let's hear all sides of the story you know?
The actual story: https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/14-year-old-accused-of-shooting-sister-and-killing-boyfriend-with-shot-gun/ar-BBXAxMT
The actual story: https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/14-year-old-accused-of-shooting-sister-and-killing-boyfriend-with-shot-gun/ar-BBXAxMT
Short Funny Story: Fatties and Their Brains
Recently Scientists have found that obesity can destroy important parts of the brain. The part that is already broke is the "I'm fucking full already" mechanism.
They think that the fatter you get the harder it is to control appetite. As you get fatter, your brain rewards the behavior that is making you fatter. That's the sort of positive reinforcement that most big eaters never got from mom and dad.
The scientists started looking into this phenomenon because teens and children are way fatter than they are supposed to be. Some of the fat fucking holy rollers that I grew up with should have been missionaries in Africa. Could have solved the lack of Lord lovin' out there and slimmed down a couple hundred pounds. You can't eat fried foods 6 days a week when there are no foods to fry.
For actual information check this out: https://www.rankred.com/obesity-could-damage-important-parts-of-the-brain/
They think that the fatter you get the harder it is to control appetite. As you get fatter, your brain rewards the behavior that is making you fatter. That's the sort of positive reinforcement that most big eaters never got from mom and dad.
The scientists started looking into this phenomenon because teens and children are way fatter than they are supposed to be. Some of the fat fucking holy rollers that I grew up with should have been missionaries in Africa. Could have solved the lack of Lord lovin' out there and slimmed down a couple hundred pounds. You can't eat fried foods 6 days a week when there are no foods to fry.
For actual information check this out: https://www.rankred.com/obesity-could-damage-important-parts-of-the-brain/
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