Jokes: 9 Short Jokes for the Sake of Meta Humor

"I can finish 10 blog posts of high quality content today." 2 hours and 17 shots of vodka later and I'm wondering why the champagne isn't bubbly and why can't I get off the floor? Still happy though.  

I would've gotten up and got more done today but there was a 2-D animated rabbit messing with me all morning. I went to get carrots for him but he left to go mess with some hunter. 

That last joke was about Bugs Bunny. I fucking love Bugs Bunny. All other fictional bunnies can go fuck themselves. Bugs4lyfe bitch 

The irony of the first joke is that I never make high quality content. 

I went to the grocery store to get groceries but decided to burn it down on the way. Somebody beat me to it. So I volunteered for the clean up crew. I meant to spend an evening there and nothing was gonna stop me.  

Don't worry about that last joke, there is more than one grocery store in town. 

I'm glad February is almost over. My neighbor told me that the apocalypse is starting in March and that will probably be more exciting than working a Valentine's day event in a restaurant. 

Thanks to alcohol, I may have life threatening liver damage. But thanks to alcohol, I can find a way to smile about it. 

Full disclosure, I'm not smiling about that last joke, I'm smirking with my eyes low.